The Baseball Chick

According to Wired Science:

Individuals who inherit a particular gene variant that tweaks the brain’s reward system are especially likely to drink a lot of alcohol in the company of heavy-boozing peers.

That’s the preliminary indication of a new study directed by psychology graduate student Helle Larsen of Radboud University Nijmegen in the Netherlands. Adults carrying at least one copy of a long version of the dopamine D4 receptor gene, dubbed DRD4, imbibed substantially more alcohol around a heavy-drinking peer than did others who lacked that gene variant, Larsen’s group reports in a paper published online July 7 in Psychological Science.

“Carriers of the long gene may be more attuned to, and influenced by, another person’s heavy drinking than noncarriers are,” Larsen says.

Her study provides the first evidence that a gene influences human alcohol use in social situations.

Scientists have yet to decipher the precise brain effects of DRD4’s long form. Larsen hypothesizes that in the presence of heavy drinkers, the gene variant may increase dopamine activity in brain areas that amplify alcohol’s appeal as a rewarding social activity.

“If this gene-environment interaction stands, and I don’t see why it shouldn’t, there is every reason to expect the effect would extend to drugs besides alcohol, as well to many motivated pursuits,” remarks biopsychologist Kent Berridge of the University of Michigan in Ann Arbor, who was not involved with the new study.

Sociologist Michael Shanahan of the University of North Carolina in Chapel Hill lauds the new study for ruling out the possibility that carriers of the key gene simply like to drink a lot of booze and tend to do so with other heavy drinkers. Instead, alcohol use jumped among volunteers with a long DRD4 gene who happened to see a stranger imbibe heavily for a brief time.

Larsen and her colleagues asked 60 women and 53 men to evaluate advertisements for an alcohol-abuse prevention campaign. Each volunteer entered a room that had been furnished as a typical Dutch pub, accompanied by a person of the same sex who the volunteer thought was another participant but who was actually working with the researchers.

In between two 10-minute evaluation sessions, volunteers and the researchers’ confederates were given a break. An experimenter asked them to sit at a bar stocked with peanuts, beer, wine, soda and mineral water and to drink whatever they wanted.

As instructed, confederates took the initiative and drank either two sodas, one alcoholic drink and then one soda; or three alcoholic drinks for women and four alcoholic drinks for men over a 30-minute period.

DNA analyses of saliva identified 31 volunteers as carriers of the long DRD4 gene, which contains an amino acid sequence that repeats seven times.

When confederates stuck to sodas or drank one alcoholic beverage, long-gene carriers and noncarriers alike limited themselves to an average of less than half a glass of wine or half a bottle of beer.

When confederates quaffed multiple alcoholic drinks, carriers of the gene variant consumed an average of almost two wine or beer servings, versus almost one serving for noncarriers.

These results held for men and women, all of whom said they drink socially, regardless of how much alcohol they reported drinking weekly.

Deceptive research techniques can backfire if volunteers see through them and don’t admit it to researchers (SN: 6/20/98, p. 394). But when interviewed after testing, none of the participants guessed the study’s real aim or the confederate’s agenda.

Other researchers need to confirm these findings, Larsen says. Some attempts to replicate findings from other studies of gene-environment interactions have yielded mixed results, including follow-up work on a study by researchers from Duke University in Durham, N.C., that found that another gene variant promotes depression in people who experience stress.

Thanks, dopamine D4 receptor gene!!! And cheers!

(Dumbass No. 1 To Run On Field)

(Dumbass No. 2 On Field The Following Night)

There were incidents on consecutive nights in Philadelphia during the home series against the St. Louis Cardinals this week wherein two high-IQed individuals ran onto the field while the Cardinals were at-bat.  The first was 17 years old, and the second was seven months pregnant and clearly very hungry.  Forget tasering these people, has anyone considered waterboarding?

Since Mark McGwire is coming back to baseball this year as the new hitting coach for the St. Louis Cardinals, it is clear he wanted to get something of his voluptuous steroid-induced man-tittays.

According to Mr. McGwire’s own admission, he used steroids on and off throughout the 90s, including during his record-breaking home run season.  I haven’t been this shocked since I found out Freddie Mercury was gay.

“It’s time for me to talk about the past and to confirm what people have suspected. I used steroids during my playing career and I apologize,” McGwire said in a statement released through the Cardinals. “I wish I had never touched steroids. It was a mistake. I truly apologize. Looking back, I wish I had never played during the steroids era.”

Of course this will be of minor benefit to the St. Louis Cardinals, as McGwire’s continued silence would have made it difficult for him to work productively with Holliday and the other Cardinals hitters without heavy skepticism.

McGwire somewhat defended himself by stating that his usage came with the desire to recover quickly from injuries and not as a means of cheating.  That’s crazy, because I could have sworn he did all those ‘roids because he hated having testicles.  I know I would.

MIND FREAK!!!!  Clint Barmes made like Criss Angel on Sunday with some straight rock-n-roll ninja magic.  The above photo taken by a fan at the game seems to show that Barmes did not make the catch which basically won the game for the Rockies, thereby helping to preserve their small lead in the NL Wild Card race over the Atlanta Braves.

Though the second baseman was able to turn the over-the-shoulder barrel-roll grab into a game-ending double play, a series of photos published by Rockies fan Craig Welling later that night contains one picture where it appears the ball hits the ground.

Think fans of the fast-charging Braves or the homefield-chasing Cardinals are interested in this evidence? If the ball is ruled a drop, Julio Lugo would have scored the tying run and the Cardinals would have had runners at the corners with one out. However, the Rockies would have had one more chance at the plate, so it’s not as if we can definitively say that St. Louis would have won the game and Atlanta would have crept another game closer in the NL wild card standings.  (Yahoo! Sports)

Commenting on the catch, gay pirate Ryan Spilborghs told the Denver Post:

Only me and Barmes know the truth…. It’s better that it’s (mysterious).

I guess Ryan thinks it’s better for the public to question the validity of the Rockies’ wins and resultant postseason berth.  Dumbass.

A sobering change of pace for me. I promise this will be the last time I don’t swear in a post.

The Major League Baseball regular season is winding down, which means fantasy baseball seasons are nearing their sad, miserable conclusions. If you are lacking the supreme drafting skills of yours truly, then I’m sure you have been frustrated with one or more of your high draft picks.  I simply wanted to point out ten guys that probably screwed a lot of fantasy teams in 2009.

1.  Jose Reyes – SS – New York Mets - 147 ab, .279 avg, 2 hr, 15 rbi, 11 sb

As a top three pick in most fantasy leagues, Jose Reyes had the hopes of many managers resting on his shoulders. Reyes was projected to steal 50+ bases this season while potentially improving on his power numbers in the stacked Mets lineup. However, injuries derailed these lofty hopes and in turn derailed the chances of many a fantasy baseball team unfortunate enough to draft him. Top Bust.

2.  Brad Lidge – P – Philadelphia Phillies – 25 sv, 30 op, 6.90 era, 1.77 whip

In 2008, Brad Lidge did not blow a save and finished with a 1.95 ERA and 1.23 WHIP. Fantasy owners may not have been expecting perfection, but they were not expecting eight blown saves and an ERA closer to ten than two. Some of his problems can be blamed on the knee injury, but more likely than not Lidge has just lost it. This sad sack of shit is a major headcase.  Lidge has the mental fortitude of the scarecrow from The Wizard of Oz . Additionally, this is not the first time his confidence has been severely shaken, as the mammoth blast he gave up to Albert Pujols in the playoffs a few years back began a quick downward spiral for him that many may remember. He recovered from that last year, but seems to have fallen back into the funk and I’m not so sure that he’ll be able to get out of it this time. It should be noted that I love this guy though; he makes me giggle.  Bust.

3.  David Wright – 3b – New York Mets – 426 ab, .324 avg, 8 hr, 55 rbi, 24 sb

David Wright came into the 2009 season #1 on many people’s draft boards. He combines power and speed with a high average. Whether it’s the new pitcher-friendly Citi Field or the injuries to the power bats behind him in the line-up, David Wright just does not have his power this year. With his high average draft position and due to the fact he was projected by most to hit over 30 homeruns, Wright definitely qualifies as a bust for 2009.

4. Alfonso Soriano – OF – Chicago Cubs – 459 ab, .240 avg, 19 hr, 52 rbi, 9 sb

Soriano was a mid to late first round pick in most fantasy drafts in 2009. Most projected him to hit over 30 homeruns and steal over 20 bases. He fell in some drafts due to his diminishing speed, but the power should have remained. He has never been a player to help a team average, but he has also never batted below .268 in his career. The season is not quite over yet, but it appears that Soriano will not even reach 25 homers, will struggle to steal even his tenth bag, and will finish with an average below .250.  However, his “skip-and-catch” approach in left field is in peak form and it makes him look like a pretty ballerina. Bust.

5. Chris Davis – 1b – Texas Rangers – 258 ab, .202 avg, 15 hr, 33 rbi, 0 sb

Chris Davis may have been the top “sleeper” pick (that everyone knew about) in 2009. Projected to reach 30 homers and 100 RBIs while qualifying at both corner infield spots, Davis was primed for a big year. Unfortunately, strikeouts and an early season slump knocked him off course and even landed him back in the minors. Since his early season hype bumped him way up draft boards, Davis is most definitely a bust.

6. Garrett Atkins – 3b – Colorado Rockies – 298 ab, .225 avg, 8 hr, 39 rbi, 0 sb

Garrett Atkins came into 2009 with three straight 20 plus homerun and 99 plus RBI seasons. The lowest he batted in the last three years was .286. A guy is entitled to an off year, but having less than 10 homers and 39 RBIs with a .225 batting average in only 298 at bats is just plain horrific. Yes, he had distractions such as the trade rumors and Ian Stewart breathing down his neck, but he had been the definition of consistency for three straight years. Garrett Atkins makes it hard to ever trust him again, much like every other man in my life. Bust.

7. Chris Young – OF – Arizona Diamondbacks – 315 ab, .194 avg, 7 hr, 28 rbi, 11 sb

Much like the Arizona Diamondbacks’ season, Chris Young has been a major disappointment. Many thought that this year would be his breakout year. Young has 20/20, perhaps even 30/30, potential, but he just cannot stop striking out. He is down in the minors right now killing the ball, but has not shown that he can consistently hit at the major league level. A smart manager would probably bat him fifth or sixth because his on-base skills are not those of a major league lead-off hitter.  This guy sucks. Chris Young is nothing but a bust.

8. Rick Ankiel – OF – St. Louis Cardinals – 308 ab, .234 avg, 10 hr, 34 rbi, 2 sb

Rick Ankiel was one of the best “feel-good” stories of 2008. He accomplished the rare feat of transitioning from major league pitcher to major league position player. With a big bat and a cannon for an arm, Ankiel was the talk of every ballpark he visited. However, his lack of mental toughness was the reason for his breakdown and subsequent transition. The pressure of being a major league pitcher brought about one of the worst meltdowns in MLB history. Now in his second full year as a major league hitter, he is starting to come back down to earth and we will see if he is still a mental weakling. He has battled some injuries this season, but fantasy owners who drafted him looking for power don’t want to hear the excuses.  Everyone was prepared to take a hit in average, but 10 homers in 300 at bats equals a 2009 fantasy bust.  The only thing he had going for him was his 1970s-circa policeman’s mustache, and he shaved that off too.  Therefore, he is worthless.

9. Magglio Ordonez – OF – Detroit Tigers – 351 ab, .274 avg, 7 hr, 37 rbi, 3 sb

A drop off for Magglio Ordonez was to be expected as he is now 35 years old, but after a 2008 in which he hit .317 with 21 homers and 103 RBIs, the drop off was not expected to be this severe. Mags has heated up a bit in August, but he is still three homers shy of double digits and one good month is not going to be enough to save his fantasy owners. Bottom-line, Mags is a bust.

10. Cole Hamels – P – Philadelphia Phillies – 139.1 inn, 7 wins, 4.78 era, 1.35 whip, 119 Ks

A lot of fantasy owners suspected that Cole Hamels may be a bust in 2009 because of the injury risk he presented.  After all, in the 2008 season, Hamels pitched a staggering 227 innings. Nobody considered the notion that he could be a bust while being totally healthy, but that is exactly what happened (and is happening) this season. At first the assumption was that it was simply rust following some injuries in spring training, but now it’s just silly. Cole Hamels has been consistently mediocre in 2009 and because of his high average draft position, he is a total bust.  In punishment, I think that his super-hot wife should dump his ass and take up with Cliff Lee.  Cole Hamels and his stupid mid-90s hair need a serious slump buster.

Dishonorable Mention

Jay Bruce – OF – Cincinnati Reds -  299 ab, .207 avg, 18 hr, 41 rbi, 3 sb

Alex Gordon – 3b – Kansas City Royals -  96 ab, .198 avg, 3 hr, 11 rbi, 4 sb

J.J. Hardy – SS – Milwaukee Brewers -  371 ab, .245 avg, 11 hr, 45 rbi, 0 sb

Not only did Albert Pujols go 3-5 tonight in the Cardinals’ 6-4 victory over the Pirates, but then in the 7th inning he saved an old man’s life just for kicks.

He then wiped the sweat from his brow, touched the kid in the first row and he magically didn’t have downs syndrome anymore.  After the game, he turned the clubhouse Gatorade into wine.  His will be done.  Amen.

(Source: stltoday.com)

Colby Rasmus has been trying to grow a mustache since the end of June and this is how far he’s gotten.  It’s disturbing to me.  It looks like he was napping before the game and someone rubbed poop on the corners of his mouth as a joke and he went out to play without looking in the mirror, and hasn’t looked in 4 weeks.

But the good news is we know he isn’t roiding up.  Everyone knows that high testosterone levels will cause excessive body hair growth.  It’s sad, because you know he’s thinking, “Sweet, I’m a pro baseball player now and I’m going to get laid!”  Then his a-hole teammates decided to screw him over by making him grow the most ridiculous facial hair since Dustin Hermanson.

I couldn’t post this on Friday when the trade actually happened because I was temporarily rendered comatose by the thought of what Matt Holliday can do batting behind Albert Pujols and what Albert Pujols can do batting in front of Matt Holliday.

Whew!  I almost just blacked out again.  It’s shocking and actually a bit nauseating, just like when you find out you’ve been living in the matrix.

Anyways, the A’s acquired third baseman Brett Wallace, righthanded starter Clay Mortensen and outfielder Shane Peterson in the deal for Holliday.  Holliday hit .286 with 11 homers and 54 RBI for Oakland this season.  Interestingly, Holliday had eliminated his high leg kick during off-season training with Mark McGwire; however, he had returned to his old plate technique in his last month with the A’s.  Not surprisingly, it was also his most productive month.

Crack open an icy cold Budweiser Cardinals Nation, because Chris Duncan is no longer a member of the St. Louis Cardinals.  The wackiest part is…they actually got a real life baseball player for him.  Not a good one or anything (Julio Lugo), but a living, breathing human.  I would have traded him for a six pack of Pabst Blue Ribbon.

“… he hasn’t scored a hit in nine straight games and is now batting just .227/.329/.358 with five dingers and 32 RBI in 260 at-bats. He has also struck out 67 times this year and brings absolutely nothing to the table defensively.” (RotoWorld)

When asked about the trade, Chris Duncan was quoted as saying, “Fire…BAD!”