The Baseball Chick

Just as sure as the sky is blue, the sun rises in the east, and Tom Cruise is gay, Brad Lidge is certain to choke when it really matters.  Actually, it’s a relief because sometimes, when the world feels all topsy-turvy, I know I can look to Brad Lidge for the consistency my life lacks.  I can simply turn on the TV during the spring, summer or fall and a wave of relief will wash over me as I am assured that, yes, everything is as it should be.  Just as long as Brad Lidge is up there on the mound in the 9th inning, ripping the hearts out of fans from coast-to-coast, I know there is always a reason to smile.

Lidge said after the game, “I felt good.  I felt like it would be one of those innings that would be a good quick inning.”  Traveling out of the Never-Never Land Mr. Lidge resides in, what really happened is stated below:

[Damon] fouled off three consecutive nasty sliders. Lidge then missed with two fastballs. Then he threw two more fastballs, which Damon fouled off…. But Damon wouldn’t go away.

Damon’s single to left seemed innocent enough, but the urgency of the inning immediately was turned up when Damon broke for second on the first pitch.

Whatever the explanation, Lidge lost it. All that nasty stuff he had for the first three batters of the inning was gone. He immediately plunked Teixeira on the elbow. Alex Rodriguez then came to the plate. Second base was open — with Mariano Rivera looming in the bullpen, it didn’t really matter if the Yankees scored one or two or three runs — so Lidge could have pitched around Rodriguez. He wanted to pitch him inside. His second fastball was inside, but not far enough. Rodriguez smoked it into the left-field corner for a two-run double. (Fanhouse.com)

 As avid a National League supporter as I may be, there is something so wonderfully silly and ridiculous about the obscene amount of chances Brad Lidge has been getting.  Why is he cut so much slack?  Did he save a bunch of orphans from a building engulfed in flames?  I guess it really just goes to show how low the overall talent level is amongst Major League relief pitchers.  Even Jeff Fassero had a long MLB career!

Man, I love watching National League ballgames.  However, something in my heart goes aflutter everytime these closers blow another game in the 9th, just like I’m one of those chicks on the Antonio Sabato, Jr. dating show.  I feel like a giddy schoolgirl again!  I’ve decided to start writing love letters to these wonderful, beautiful men who make me feel so good inside…

Dear Kevin:

I loved turning on SportsCenter every night at the beginning of summer.  I liked that you didn’t play games with me.  You were so consistent.  I knew that every night, I could turn down the lights, burn some candles, flip on some Barry White, and watch you ruin another potential Cubs victory.  You were my reason for watching every night!  When I was feeling down, I knew that your crappy pitching could put a smile on my face.  You’re so sweet to me!  I even looked for a Kevin Gregg jersey, but I think those horrible Cubs fans burned them all in anger.  Why don’t they just accept you for what you do so well, which is blowing games!?!

I’m so sad that they don’t let you close anymore.  It’s obvious to me that Lou Pinella is just jealous of your sex appeal, with those hot glasses and all.  I yearn for your 90 mile per hour fastball, sailing like a gigantic beach ball over the plate, to be in my life once again.

Love,

thebaseballchick